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7/7/19 12:56 P

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emoticon DAY #89 emoticon

Day 89 - I知 so angry



When you reach for food to appease anger, you might be fixing the wrong emotion. By paying attention to other emotions besides anger, you値l get a more accurate picture of the situation and why it upsets you..

Today

Identify a recent or past time when you felt intense anger.

I致e felt angry with myself off and on for the last several weeks. Stressful life events have gotten me off track from my healthy diet and regular exercise schedule.

Write, 的知 angry and I知 also then list other emotions you were feeling.

I知 angry and I知 also:
-frustrated with myself for getting off track
-worried about sudden unexpected financial obligations
-disappointed that I am not 杜aintaining and have regained weight
-scared I will go back to being a 土o-yo dieter again and gain back weight

Create a plan for dealing with the emotions that weren稚 actually anger.

-I already know all the answers and what I need to do
-I already have the plan in my blog and need to get back on schedule
www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_p
ublic_jour
nal_individual.asp?blog_id=6
531297

-I just need life events to stop snowballing and slow down so I can manage
-I need to accept where I am in the middle of this situation and take it a day at a time and realize that 摘ven this too shall pass!






~~~MARILYN ~~~
Virginia - Eastern Time Zone
The worst thing to be without--hope.
The most effective sleeping pill--peace of mind.
The main reason my past diets failed--lack of motivation.
The greatest "shot in the arm"-- encouragement.


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,499
7/6/19 3:24 P

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Well, what do you know? My upstairs neighbour is home, and today he fell asleep with the taps running in his bathroom - so it started coming through my ceiling.

I went and knocked on his door - then I ate two cookies with a cup of coffee!

I was angry because this is the second time this has happened.............

I was angry......... and I felt helpless, vulnerable, insecure, alone.

I sent an email to the housing officer.
I put my radio on to listen to music.
I'm going to get out a jigsaw puzzle now.

Phew! When the student is ready, the teacher appears?!
emoticon

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,732
7/6/19 9:17 A

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Day 89 I知 so angry

When you reach for food to appease anger, you might be fixing the wrong emotion. By paying attention to other emotions besides anger, you値l get a more accurate picture of the situation and why it upsets you..

Identify a recent or past time when you felt intense anger.
Sadly I can get intense anger feelings at myself when I have overindulged on some food not on my plan or not planned! Weigh In day can also be a day when I get cross with myself if the scales are not as low (within my Target range) as they should be for me to go to club to WI)

Write, 的知 angry and I知 also then list other emotions you were feeling.
In these examples "I'm angry but also I'm disappointed, fed up, worried I'm being a little weak,
hopeless, annoyed

Create a plan for dealing with the emotions that weren稚 actually anger.
I know when this happens that I have to be patient and kind with myself and that I have to forgive myself if I think I need it and not eat to make myself or my anger feel better. Luckily I rarely am angry other than WI day.


Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
JUNEPA's Photo JUNEPA Posts: 14,510
7/5/19 6:18 P

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Day 89 I知 so angry

When you reach for food to appease anger, you might be fixing the wrong emotion. By paying attention to other emotions besides anger, you値l get a more accurate picture of the situation and why it upsets you..

Today

Identify a recent or past time when you felt intense anger.
Write, 的知 angry and I知 also then list other emotions you were feeling.
Create a plan for dealing with the emotions that weren稚 actually anger.


Identify a recent or past time when you felt intense anger.

I had trouble with anger as a child. I had a temper and would rage when I got angry. I processed a lot about this and as I grew up, I learned there is a difference between anger, which is a healthy emotion and wrath/rage with is acting out, verbally or physically damaging things or people. But being angry isn't wrong. It is a natural reaction to injustice ( to others or self). One injustice to self that makes me angry (besides being cheated or lied to ) is being disrespected. Now when I am angry I look for the source of injustice and try to discern if it is something I can to about it or if it is beyond my realm. I don't repress anger, I explore it. So it doesn't fester or grow usually. Sometimes when something is beyond my realm, I get angry and then have to remind myself that it is not my thing to be angry about. My brother, whom my mother left a trust fund because he is so hopeless at managing his money, I used to get mad at his poor choices, because he asks for trust fund money when he has no money. He still can spend his pension any way he wants while his inheritance is in trust. His trust pays for his living expenses (food, rent, clothes, phone) , he gets his pension once a month. He spends his pension money within days of getting it. He mostly gives it away to people who are enabled in bad decisions, his addict friends, who have family "emergencies" like not enough food for their kids, or having the power cut because they haven't paid the bill, while the reason they don't have money (welfare money) is because they spend that money on their addictions. He doesn't have any substance abuse addictions, he is a teetotaler and has never used drugs. Then he has no money for when he has an emergency. I have told and told him to save some of his pension for an emergency fund. Today he phoned me (within 2 weeks of getting his pension cheque, he has another 2 weeks before he gets the next one) and asked for $30 because he locked his keys in his car and needs to have the towing company to come and open his car. I said no, and began a tirade about why, why, why doesn't he have any savings. Then, while I had plenty left to say in my anger, I stopped and said calmly, "You have heard this before, my anger when this happens, my refusal to give you money, same old same old" He is always polite and he said yes okay, have a good day, He is one old dog unwilling to change his (to me obviously dysfunctional) ways.



Write, 的知 angry and I知 also then list other emotions you were feeling.

I'm angry, I'm also irritated, annoyed, exasperated, impatient, ticked, upset, tense, grouchy

Create a plan for dealing with the emotions that weren稚 actually anger.

I try to discern why I feel anger, and I try to mend the injustice if I can, and I try to be calm and leave it alone if I can't mend it and it is not my business.

Edited by: JUNEPA at: 7/5/2019 (18:50)
June -- Pacific Time Zone
Where you end up is more important than how fast or where you start out.
- Improved fitness and nutrition, energy and confidence are my rewards.
It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
A PH (personal high) is the main goal, a PB is the sometime icing on the cake.
Never underestimate the inevitability of gradualness.
Sopra le nebbie delle valle e le vicende della vita sorge una promessa di luce e serenita.


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7/5/19 6:35 A

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I was so angry about my dh痴 attitude towards me that I wanted to get ice cream but it was 11 PM and I had already taken my medicine! I read an entire book and then slept for about 4 hrs. I got up and dressed and went looking for ice cream! I was too upset to read the lesson on anger. First I bought a sugar free iced vanilla coffee. Then I drove to gas station and bought a blended mocha coffee, eggs, and a pint of vanilla ice cream. I drank the coffee first and when I got home started eating the ice cream, knowing the corn syrup in it could make me sick. I ended up throwing 1/8 of it away. The rest of the day I stayed on plan.
Well I felt both rejected and put down. I have a list of all the blessings I have as a child of God. Today I am going to begin illustrating each Bible verse.

Matthew 11:28 Come unto me all ye that are heavy laden and I will give you rest unto your soul.


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,499
7/4/19 12:12 P

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My upstairs neighbour is home after being away for 11 days - yes, I've been counting them.

He was taken away by paramedics.......so I assume he's been in hospital, but I don't know, he might have been renab.

As soon as I heard his voice upstairs I said, through gritted teeth, "Welcome home, A---!"

He can't hear me through the ceiling. I was being kind of passive-agressive.

As well as feeling angry I feel.....

- Annoyed
- Disappointed
- Concerned
- Pissed off
- Helpless

My plan is to go out for a bike ride
Do some yoga
Read my book
Play my recorder
Listen to music
Do a puzzle
Use a sleep track on YouTube to help me sleep



Edited by: SWEETENUFGILL at: 7/4/2019 (12:15)
Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,800
7/4/19 10:16 A

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DAY #89 I'M SO ANGRY - ROUND 2

Oh the wisdom of our Team Guru, Gill!

- I know that some people are perpetually angry - their responses to everything is anger. I know that when I'm unwell, or very tired, I can snap heads off quite easily!

- Anger, it seems to me, is really our body/mind/heart/soul saying "I can't take this any more!"

- It doesn't mean I don't still get it wrong - but I get it wrong less often! If you've worked through these books before, you'll know what I mean - we can predict when the volcano is going to erupt! We can hear the pot bubbling before it boils over!

- One final thought.............. how often are you aware of feeling angry with YOURSELF?

I underlined nearly every line in today's lesson! ! ! Yup. I get angry. Yup. I am a reactive type of person. I am also, someone who recognizes this short coming in myself and I have been diligently working on improving this characteristic. Like Gill mentioned, I still slip when the stress gets real high, but more often I can identify when the situation is out of my control, take a deep breath, and let it go.

I read an something this morning that really spoke to me about awareness:

- "Meditation also helped me with this by teaching me to create pause and spaciousness around my decisions, and to be able to choose rather than react."

That pause and spaciousness part felt so good to me. It is where I want to be. So I will continue to work on myself and identifying situations that are out of my control. No sense wasting energy on anything I cannot change.

Anger does not bring about change; it only brings resentment!
Happy 4th of July my fellow Americans!

emoticon



Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,208
6/8/19 9:20 A

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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,499
9/15/18 9:12 A

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Yes! That's the one I watched.
emoticon

Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,208
9/15/18 8:51 A

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Sharing with friends. I do believe, I can handle "any" situation much better without food.
Thanks Gill. I found Pam Ayers, funny and a joy to watch u.nu/mfs6


Edited by: AURA18 at: 6/8/2019 (09:49)
Maribeth MN CT Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u u.nu/httpsunu7lag u.nu/43qj2
SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,499
9/15/18 6:21 A

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Thanks for sharing. Seems to me that the bottom line is that we are becoming champion stress managers!

Yesterday evening, I went out for a stress busting walk. It definitely helped. When I got back, I made a cup of tea and thought I'd do some knitting. But as I was searching for some music on my tablet, I hit upon Pam Ayres, and ended up enjoying watching her comedy shows - it really made me laugh - real laughter that I don't do much.

If I hadn't been upset by my upstairs neighbour's noise, I wouldn't have been looking for music and I wouldn't have found Pam Ayres.


Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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FUNLOVEN's Photo FUNLOVEN Posts: 2,800
9/14/18 7:34 P

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Day #89 I'm So Angry

This is a good lesson for me. I used to be angry all of the time, but that was years ago and I have learned a lot since that time although I have more to learn.

Some thoughts came to my mind when I read this lesson. I understand that anger is only a symptom of other underlying emotions. The list that Linda gave us is a great reference tool to figure out what we really are feeling. I try to remember that we are all more alike than we are different.

However, I am not very patient with rude, thoughtless people and there seems to be a lot of them in this world. I can be, as a friend of mine points out, snarky with people at times. Like the guy in the hotel lobby-side bar at one of the hotels we were at a few days ago. I just was not in the mood for his fowl language and I let him know it.

I recognize that I need to work on ways to handle my anger "on the spot". Some possible solutions for me is to remember:

1. Not my problem
2. Get out of my head
3. Say a prayer for the person
4. Keep my mouth shut
5. Mind your own business

I am a work in progress!


Sue

Michigan - EST

LIVE-BREATHE-ENJOY LIFE!
"Live life to its fullest and make the most of every day."


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MASTERPIECE8's Photo MASTERPIECE8 Posts: 9,925
9/14/18 9:57 A

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Anger. For many, many years I hid my feelings. Didn't work well for me at all. So I learned to try to say how I felt in a way that wasn't hurtful. That didn't always work either. You know why. I think others were 'angry at me' then because I wasn't letting them use me any longer.

I try to stay away from toxic people. Boy are there ever a lot of them out there too! I'm not here to respond to everyone else's needs. I have my own needs.

It's another learning process. It's been a hard lesson for me to learn, but it's definitely not good for me to hold things in all the time. Of course, I used to turn to a lot of comfort foods. Now I have other outlets - SP, art, walking, yoga, call a friend . . . You just have to look for them and be open to trying new things.

Babs
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MAWMAW101's Photo MAWMAW101 Posts: 12,670
9/14/18 9:31 A

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Day #89 I知 so angry
This is a hard lesson because as I think of anger there are so many things from the 屠unk in the backyard that spring up for me.
At this point I can see that some of it is hurt feelings, unfair treatment, distrust, frustration, being really scared, etc.
I believe the best thing I learned through the years is to just make sure what I知 feeling isn稚 misplaced anger so I don稚 say or do to those close to me what isn稚 really meant for them.
My plan, don稚 just stuff it with food but take time to make sure anger isn稚 used as a weapon on those I love.


Phyllis ~~
Indiana - Eastern Time
20/20 Vision- What we focus on expands. 哲ever give up on the dream!


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9/14/18 8:59 A

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I don稚 get angry very often, but I do get hurt, disappointed and frustrated.....and yes then I feel that I知 entitled to eat comfort food.

What I need to do instead is try to see the other person痴 point of view, meditate, take a walk, drink water, but my husband痴 treats usually call me.

Another thing I do is turn to 100 days.....Linda, Gill and Susan give me the inspiration I need to continue this healthy way of life. emoticon emoticon

Edited by: GLORIAZ at: 9/14/2018 (09:00)
One day at a time!


Gloria.
EST Pennsylvania
2017 Spring 5% Challenge Tiger Monarchs
Biggest Loser Summer Challenge Golden Phoenix
Biggest Loser Fall Challenge Golden Phoenix 2017


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DSJB9999's Photo DSJB9999 Posts: 6,732
9/14/18 8:47 A

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Day 89 Iソスm so angry

I rarely feel anger, more likely disappointment, sometimes with myself or other family members!

Perhaps I do sneak eat when I am feeling like this, definitely the wrong cure for this anger.

When my dh and children went away for a much needed 10 days away my Sis in Law was meant to let us know if we cud book for the same week next year as we wud get 40% off and she NEVER let us know any time that week so my dh and I were cross!

I am still angry with her and I'm also disappointed/frustated/taken for granted as we care for my MiL almost every other night of the year! I know this 'anger' is not a good emotion and I do not want to upset my dh so am forgetting about it for now. 汳ェ汨条沽 I do not go into the kitchen, near food if I am thinking about her or this issue as I know food won't help!


Donna
Lancashire, UK

dsjb99@yahoo.co.uk

don't have a facebook account
CAT125's Photo CAT125 Posts: 28,689
9/14/18 8:39 A

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Day 89 I知 so angry



Cat, in Florida
Eastern Time Zone


Pounds lost in 2020......


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SWEETENUFGILL's Photo SWEETENUFGILL Posts: 19,499
9/14/18 4:30 A

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I find that I put the lid on anger so quickly I hardly notice it's there - until I'm reaching for potato chips, or feeling a knot in my right shoulder, or laying in bed wide-awake wondering why I can't go to sleep!

If I do notice myself feeling angry, I talk myself down from it pretty quickly too........... and try to accommodate whatever is going on with reasoning.

I sometimes walk away from situations, or get away from people who are annoying me. I can also act in a very impatient way with people - I think that's probably anger. Sometimes I literally run away from it - and go for a run!

I've felt momentarily very angry about the noisy neighbour upstairs - on one occasion I surprised myself by shouting a rude word at the ceiling!

On that occasion I felt angry and I was also...................exasperated, exhausted, stressed, depressed, scared.

My response is to occupy myself with something else - during the day I can put the radio on, or listen to music - and night I can put relaxation music on (YouTube has some great ones), get up and make a cup of tea, read my book for a while. Yesterday evening when they were noisy, I went and had a relaxing bath (the noise of the bathroom fan drowns them out) and listened to an audio version of a book I'm studying on Ayruveda.

Edited by: SWEETENUFGILL at: 9/14/2018 (04:31)
Gill

Time Zone GMT (London) - yes, I'm hours ahead of most of you! Cornwall, UK

"...regardless of the short-term outcome, the very fact of your continuing to struggle is proof of your victory as a human being." Daisaku Ikeda

www.sparkpeople.com/system/howitwork
s.asp




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AURA18's Photo AURA18 Posts: 11,208
9/13/18 7:58 P

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Day 89 I知 so angry - pressure emotions (identify from list) u.nu/iodn
CopingSkills u.nu/tn8p I can feel : stomach knots, muscle tension, "fight or flight" / stress hormones. I will feel worse...if I eat. I'm drinking water and finding distractions: read, walk, clean, & relax.

I may wait 2-3 hours till physically hungry
u.nu/0k-r

most common, "Lack of understanding and vulnerable caregiver jobs."
I can resolve problems before they Peak to Prevent overeating.

Edited by: AURA18 at: 6/8/2019 (09:54)
Maribeth MN CT Panthers draxe.com/ dance u.nu/ixjy planks u.nu/9w-u u.nu/httpsunu7lag u.nu/43qj2
CD13384562 Posts: 7,356
5/8/18 10:23 P

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Day 89 I知 so angry

When you reach for food to appease anger, you might be fixing the wrong emotion. By paying attention to other emotions besides anger, you値l get a more accurate picture of the situation and why it upsets you..

Today

Identify a recent or past time when you felt intense anger.
Write, 的知 angry and I知 also then list other emotions you were feeling.
Create a plan for dealing with the emotions that weren稚 actually anger.

Link to Day 88 www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/
team_messa
geboard_thread.asp?board=200
58x211
94x69021177


Link to Day 90
www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/
team_messa
geboard_thread.asp?board=200
58x211
94x69021184


Edited by: CD13384562 at: 5/19/2018 (17:15)
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