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Easter 2010 Weight about 230

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I have always been a bit over weight, though mostly "in shape". When I turned 18, i dropped out of High School, got my GED and joined the U.S Army. I thought I would spend the rest of my life in the military, but that didn't happen. In basic i lost about 10 lbs and 4 pants sizes. I fit into size 6-8 jeans, and felt amazing. I weighed in at about 160. I got married to the most amazing man in the entire world in 2007, literally 4 days after I finished training. About a year into my military career I started having bad back problems and SEVERE back spasms. Needless to say, I was put on a no run no jump no march profile, and could only walk/stand for an hour at a time. I wasn't allowed to lift more than 25 lbs. I started to put on more and more weight, They gave me a breast reduction to help ease the stress on 5 degenerating disks in my back, but It took months to get into physical therapy after the surgery, I was basically sedentary for 6 months, during which I discovered some amazing restaurants. I shot up to 190 and was put on the Overweight program. I worked hard for a few weeks, but because I never restrengthened my back I threw it out after a month, and wasn't able to keep up the exercise. I wasn't losing 2-3 lbs a week because I couldn't exercise properly (the pool was closed for construction/repairs) and the "eating right" just wasn't enough. In feb of 2009 I was discharged for "failure to meet weight standards" I got depressed and angry, The army was supposed to be my LIFE! I kept eating and not exercising, and gained another 50lbs (up to 240). I am completely disgusted with myself and shocked that my husband can even look at me, let alone be physically attracted to me. I am done. Finished. I'm going to kick those extra 80 lbs in the face, then toss out an extra 5-10 for good measure...the only problem is that I am HORRIBLE at keeping myself motivated because I get frustrated at my inability to do what I used to do, then give up. so Im here! Hopefully yall can help me stay on track!

Member Since: 8/18/2010

Fitness Minutes: 590

My Goals:
I want to be healthy. Sure I want to look pretty in a dress, but most of all I want to be able to hike, and climb, and run. I want to be strong and confident again. I know what it's like to be healthy, fit, confident, and (I'll claim it!) hot! Its hell knowing what you could be/have been and seeing what you have let yourself become. I want the way I feel now to be a part of my past. Something that I can look back on and think "Wow, look where I've been" but never have to go back.

My Program:
I have some medical problems so I wont be able to exercise as hard as I want to or think I should be able too (But I will be pushing myself to my own limits), so I am buckling down on my diet.

Personal Information:
I'm 23, married 5 years. Originally I'm from Seattle, WA but my hubby is from Niagara Falls so we moved back east to spend time with his family before we settle back home. I used to be in the US Army and being a soldier is the only thing (aside from being a mom) that I have ever wanted to do. That didn't work out, and now I'm completely lost trying to redefine myself, my goals, and my passions. Coming here is a large step in that journey.

Other Information:

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  • v LEHIA13
    You have been gone for so long I hope everything is okay!
    2948 days ago
    Thank you for stopping by my blog "speechless moments" .. as you can see from my av i am a long way off from anything but it sure was nice to hear it . You are amazing now You are just improving upon that . emoticon
    3021 days ago
  • v LEHIA13
    i know i have been quiet, but i hope that you are doing well on your goals.
    3033 days ago
    Oh gosh, I know what you mean. That's been hard for me, too. Allowing myself to feel ok about eating that stupid brownie was a hurdle. But then I realized that if I'm ok with it, I don't want to eat the brownie so badly in the first place!

    Also, tracking everything on here has been a big deal. The last time I used SP, I was tracking everything but "estimating" amounts and making foods up when I couldn't find the exact thing in the database. This was conveniently always in my favor of course. And because I knew I was essentially lying to myself to make myself feel better and to allow myself to eat a bit more, it didn't serve as the accountability that it's supposed to. I'm really making an effort to to provide accurate info on my tracker now - even if I don't like it!

    The hardest thing about all this is getting the eff over my brain's little tricks! haha
    3059 days ago
    So far, I've had really good luck with an app called Zombies, Run!, which is a running app. I'm doing the 5k training verson. Only on week 2 of the workouts so far, but I really like it. I definitely feel the effects!

    For diet, I am just trying to eat whole, real food. Cutting out crap that doesn't have any real nutritional value. I'm still counting my calories and whatnot, but trying not to fret about what the numbers are. If I'm eating good stuff, and my body is happy, that's good enough for me. (:

    What have you had the most luck with?
    3061 days ago
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