Well, it's been a long time since I've blogged on here...I've kind of taken a hiatus in being very active on Spark People. I've been pretty busy focusing on my school work, and getting happier with myself, over all, and I'm starting to feel like I'm in a really good place. I haven't had any nightmares about Iraq in months. I haven't felt any depression this winter, and I've been doing an excellent job with school. This week, I'll be finishing up my internship, and then it's just killing time until graduation!
That said, my weight hasn't really budged. My parents are strongly encouraging me to, once and for all, do something about it (in fact, they've kind of established a sort of reward/incentive system for me), and frankly, I'm feeling ready to really do this. I WANT to feel confident in social situations once again. I'd LOVE to go out on a date with an attractive guy and feel GOOD about myself while on that date. I'd LOVE to be more active, and not have it be such a CHORE. I'd love to go bathing suit shopping (heck, I'd settle for just plain old regular clothes shopping) and not have it be a total nightmare in shame. I'd LOVE to not be obsessing about food, thinking about it, dreaming about it, every single second of the day. I DESPERATLY want to feel strong, healthy, and confident in my own skin. I want to be able to clip my toenails without the 3-ring circus production.
So, I've been doing a lot of reading about health topics these past few months (it's about the only reading I've allowed myself to do since I've been so busy with school and my internship and work). I've done a lot of reading, particularly about eating whole, real foods, and I'm convinced that this is the avenue to go. I'm not going to be afraid of fat, or nutritious carbohydrates or protein. I am giving myself full permission to eat from ALL THREE macronutrient categories.
I've done a pretty good job in the past few months of severely limiting the processed foods. What I'm still struggling to eliminate is the occasional bag of Doritos (which are like the WORST processed food you could eat--apparently they have some SERIOUSLY nasty chemicals sprayed on them), huge bowls of popcorn (my favorite food) with an entire stick of butter melted on it (my OTHER favorite food) and frozen pizza. In the past couple of weeks I managed to stop buying the frozen pizzas and I drove through the Little Caesar's drive-through instead.
I haven't lost any weight in the past few months...but I haven't gained any either. So that in itself is a miracle. Imagine a winter where I'm not gaining weight! But, thanks to my three (not so little) vices, I'm not losing weight, inspite of an overall reduction in the AMOUNT of food I'm eating. (Apparently it's pretty easy to go over your daily calorie limit when you eat well all day and then come home and consume an entire pizza or a stick of butter with some popcorn...who knew??)
So I've been reading a lot about REAL nutrition, and I've been reading a lot of blogs.
One blog that really caught my eye, that seems like something I'd be interested in emulating is this one: 1940sexperiment.wordpres
. The author is eating based on rations allowed in England during WWII. I've always LOVED that era, I'm becoming more and more convinced that we as humans need to return to the OLD ways of eating when it comes to our food, and, this seems like a fun challenge.
So I'm going to emulate this woman's great idea, but with a few changes. She includes margarine in her plan (which is authentic to the time period), but I'm not going to touch the stuff. No fake food! Her rations don't include chicken, and mine will. I will be allowing myself to have either 1 whole chicken, averaging 3.5 lbs, or 1 lb of beef per week. She's only using 1 egg per week (again, authentic), but I'm just not THAT ambitious, and I'm allowing myself to have 3 eggs a week. She is using sugar, but I'm not allowing for any sugar...rather, I'll use honey if I have a need for a sweetener (and I'm not planning to use the entire allottment of 8 oz. every week. One huge difference between what I am going to do and what she is doing is that she is not currently keeping track of the amount of bread, potatoes, and fruit and vegetables she's eating. I plan to do that. I'm going to "ration" an allotment for cheese, for butter, for milk, and even for fruit and vegetables. I've spent some time running the numbers on my "plan" and if I aim for an average of 10,500 calories a week (which would be 1500 calories a day) my plan will fall within a range of 9,500 calories to 11,500 calories per week, which I think is entirely reasonable and sustainable.
The idea of "rationing" my food is really appealing to me. Not because I feel I have to deprive myself, but because I will have more control, and yet more freedom in what I eat this way. I feel that, shopping once a month for the amount of items on my list that are freezable or long-lasting (like a carton of eggs) and once a week for my produce and determining that I must make everything last until the next week will go a LONG way in spurring on my weight loss. The list of rations seems quite large right now. I wonder what it will look like once it's actually laid out on my kitchen counter??
I'm toying with the idea of starting another blog on wordpress or blogspot or something else where I can post pictures to document my experiment.
This next week I will focus on eliminating food I already have in my freezer and cupboards and taking inventory on what will be left over at the end of the week so I can actually start my "rationing plan" the first week of March!