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Thursday Morning...

Thursday, March 04, 2010

Good Morning!

My glucose came in @115 this morning.

Boy..yesterday was a little tough...I just seemed to hit a wall mentally and with my energy...not sure, I just was feeling really tired and sort of burnt...but I've had enough of these little "storms" now to know and trust that they will pass and that my job is just to stick with it and get on the other side of it by following through w/my plan no matter what.

Got up early and banged out my early morning sit-ups and walking, later this morning it's strength training Back & Shoulders and then another light cardio walk after dinner tonight.

Last night I substituted 3 of these low carb/sugar free banana cookies Cindy made for my after-dinner snack instead of my normal 3/4 scoop muscle milk light....60 calories each, so 180 calories vs 73, and a few extra carbs....it seems like since cutting out all simple whole grain carbs, and just getting the majority of my carbs from vegetables/fruit...that like once a week, I have to break out from that and give myself something normal...I don't know.

No question I think too much, but I also know that making these habits stick for me is all about being consistent and disciplined. So in the big picture I know I'm doing good...and no complaints, but I can see that sometimes I just get burnt. I'm not trying to make the substitution last night a bigger deal than it is, my calories for yesterday were 1278...and so it wasn't some kind of big splurge...but I'm really observing and being as mindful as I can of what I do, how I respond and/or react to life, my feelings etc...in relationship to how I then take care of myself...I'm really trying to learn as much as I can as I go...I really want to be successful, and I get that part of any successful project is making some mistakes or riding the learning curve...I'm slowly accepting that getting bummed out by not getting everything locked in perfect, or with exact precision...that that thinking is a set-up....I've known that for a long time in my head, but really letting that go and genuinely embracing the parts of me and how I behave that are flawed or that struggle and being cool with that instead of getting lost in depression, self-pity or all of the other bs I've told myself....that change is what I'm looking for and starting to feel.

I'm not sure if any of that makes sense to anybody but me....but I'm honestly trying to make sure that I really wring it out everyday, I don't want to be just blazing by anything that could linger and trip me up down the road again & again....I know it's not going to be perfect, but I'm trying to be good to myself by being honest with myself as perfectly as I can.

Ok enough of that "deep thoughts" stuff!

Today my meal plan shook out like this: .5 balance bar for my pre-breakfast, 3/4 special k protein plus ceral + .5 cup skim milk, and a cup of good old black coffee for breakfast. Home made low-carb healthy chili & an apple, 40oz water for lunch, a couple 3/4 scoop protein powder & water shakes for snacks between breakfast & lunch, lunch & dinner and really great home-made asian chicken salad for dinner w/some crystal light. Lastly another 3/4 scoop + water protein shake after my after dinner walk but before 8pm.

It's sunny here in Madison and I'm going to make it a great day to rally into tomorrow's weigh-in. Wish me luck, I'm going for it.

I hope everybody has a really Smooth Thursday! Ryan
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • MSEVERLAST
    GOOD FOR YOU! The emotions that go along with this are huge. I think some people don't realize that. It's good that you are making sure you are in touch with them so you can handle them head on!
    4127 days ago
  • CAROLANN27
    Your blog makes perfect sense to me. You are so insightful and conscientious. I know you are going to get the maximum amount of good possible from this journey. Just keep doin' it!
    4128 days ago
  • TEDYBEAR2838
    Your dedication continues to amaze and motivate me!
    4128 days ago
  • KAILIIA
    I have also cut out most carbs from processed food (occasional slice of mullti-grain bread with whole wheat flour but that's it) but I also find that those little treats help keep me feeling "normal" and like I am not deprived or missing out on anything. I say - enjoy the treat if it fits in your food plan for the day :)
    4128 days ago
  • NONNA1997A
    Hang in there, buddy! I undertstand completely and look forward to reading your blog every day.
    4128 days ago
  • NEWLIBRARIAN
    Really an occasional treat is a good and ok thing. Keep moving forward. I am enjoying following your blog.
    4128 days ago
  • BLANCHE1254
    Ryan, I respect and honor your desire to write everything out. I see it as a strengthening tool, something that is helping you find your path. You've done so well and I cheer you on to tomorrow and beyond.
    emoticon
    4128 days ago
  • BELUGA20
    Regime when it comes to food is a good thing to a point. I've heard people say "Bore yourself thin!" But who really wants to do that? I like delicious foods, so boring myself thin just isn't going to work for me. It's okay to indulge once in a while, as long as you stay with in your calorie range. I mean, you can't completely banish cookies from your life... you just have to include healthy cookies... and maybe less often.
    4128 days ago
  • IMJUSTFLUFFY
    Hang in there..you are doing so much better than I am...that's for sure! I'm struggling with being consistant with my intake...
    You make me want to try harder!
    I know perfect isn't ever going to be in my vocabulary but improvement IS! LOL
    You Rock!
    Rhonda
    4128 days ago

    Comment edited on: 3/4/2010 10:48:24 AM
  • JANEYINMADTOWN
    Ryan...we are human and not meant to be perfect...The only thing I would like you to think about if you are expecting perfection, you will set yourself up for demotivation/disappointment. Please do not be so hard on yourself. Getting healthy really is a process so seek and take enjoyment in the things you are doing...it's a lifestyle. One of my original Fast Break Goals was to maintain a positive outlook each day and it remains on my goals. Conciously reminding yourself to look at the sunny side can make a difference....at least it has for me...Stay cool!
    4128 days ago
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