Thursday, March 04, 2010
My glucose came in @115 this morning.
Boy..yesterday was a little tough...I just seemed to hit a wall mentally and with my energy...not sure, I just was feeling really tired and sort of burnt...but I've had enough of these little "storms" now to know and trust that they will pass and that my job is just to stick with it and get on the other side of it by following through w/my plan no matter what.
Got up early and banged out my early morning sit-ups and walking, later this morning it's strength training Back & Shoulders and then another light cardio walk after dinner tonight.
Last night I substituted 3 of these low carb/sugar free banana cookies Cindy made for my after-dinner snack instead of my normal 3/4 scoop muscle milk light....60 calories each, so 180 calories vs 73, and a few extra carbs....it seems like since cutting out all simple whole grain carbs, and just getting the majority of my carbs from vegetables/fruit...that like once a week, I have to break out from that and give myself something normal...I don't know.
No question I think too much, but I also know that making these habits stick for me is all about being consistent and disciplined. So in the big picture I know I'm doing good...and no complaints, but I can see that sometimes I just get burnt. I'm not trying to make the substitution last night a bigger deal than it is, my calories for yesterday were 1278...and so it wasn't some kind of big splurge...but I'm really observing and being as mindful as I can of what I do, how I respond and/or react to life, my feelings etc...in relationship to how I then take care of myself...I'm really trying to learn as much as I can as I go...I really want to be successful, and I get that part of any successful project is making some mistakes or riding the learning curve...I'm slowly accepting that getting bummed out by not getting everything locked in perfect, or with exact precision...that that thinking is a set-up....I've known that for a long time in my head, but really letting that go and genuinely embracing the parts of me and how I behave that are flawed or that struggle and being cool with that instead of getting lost in depression, self-pity or all of the other bs I've told myself....that change is what I'm looking for and starting to feel.
I'm not sure if any of that makes sense to anybody but me....but I'm honestly trying to make sure that I really wring it out everyday, I don't want to be just blazing by anything that could linger and trip me up down the road again & again....I know it's not going to be perfect, but I'm trying to be good to myself by being honest with myself as perfectly as I can.
Ok enough of that "deep thoughts" stuff!
Today my meal plan shook out like this: .5 balance bar for my pre-breakfast, 3/4 special k protein plus ceral + .5 cup skim milk, and a cup of good old black coffee for breakfast. Home made low-carb healthy chili & an apple, 40oz water for lunch, a couple 3/4 scoop protein powder & water shakes for snacks between breakfast & lunch, lunch & dinner and really great home-made asian chicken salad for dinner w/some crystal light. Lastly another 3/4 scoop + water protein shake after my after dinner walk but before 8pm.
It's sunny here in Madison and I'm going to make it a great day to rally into tomorrow's weigh-in. Wish me luck, I'm going for it.
I hope everybody has a really Smooth Thursday! Ryan