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Wednesday, September 08, 2010

This blog is inspired by my favorite group on Spark People!! I was going to post on the thread but decided that I had too much to say!! So ... here goes ..

DYKT -

- I still love the Done Girls?? Even tho I have been MIA for quite some time...
- I have been in denial for quite some time about my attitude and my weight??
- I am working on a few things ... LIKE my bad attitude!!
- I have missed being on here!!
- I know the only way I can make this happen is to just do it!!
- I need to stop making excuses!!
- I let myself cry this morning, over my weight!! That is huge for me, because I don't let myself cry over too much anymore .. well .. whe it comes to me ... I guess for some reason, I don't feel that \I am worth the tears!!
- I look at my sparkpage and don't even recognize that happy girl ..
- I just want to be happy again .... really happy .. not putting on a happy face, fake happy!
- I want to feel good again ..
- I have become such a procrastinator
- I don't know what else to say!

I really don't know what else to say. I have had so much of other peoples junk heaped on me in the past year or so that I have felt competely beat down .. or loaded down.

When it comes to me and what I need .... I won't jump out of bed and get to it ... I wil forothers ... but .. not for myself ... part of the whole avoidance thing!!

I know what I need to do ... I know how to fix it ... I am just reluctant to do it ... that reason has eluded me. The reason I love food so mch has eluded me as well.

I just need to stop making excuses and just get off my butt!!!

**sighs** Maybe one day I will get back to the happy person in the those pics! I have a lot to be thankful for ... I have such a blessed life!! Maybe I should start there .. with what I do have!! And forget about what was or could be ... an d just focus on what I need to do now!

**sighs again**

Just putting my thoughts out there ... hopefully getting them out will help clear my head some!!!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • WOLFKITTY
    Poor sweetie.. I hope things are better now.
    HUGS!
    Jocelyn

    Let
    's make them even greater!
    3568 days ago
  • JAAM1224
    Your sparkling smile brought me too your page through friend, of friend of friends... I hope you found your sparkle again. emoticon I know it is an uphill battle right now but deep inside you is the power, strength, staminia you had no idea you had.. grab hold it, use it, you will be happier, stronger, powerful, sparkling for it.... may you be blessed beyond belife this Christmas season!
    3796 days ago
  • JMARIES51
    I am also back for the umpteenth time and this time I have decided to stop being so invisible and start giving back to other people. I regained the 30 pounds that I lost the first time I stared on Spark so it feels like I have a long way to go to just get back to where I was. Gosh, I am going to be 60 in January. I think it is about time I kicked my own butt to get in shape for the rest of my life. Time is running out and I plan to be able to keep up with the youngsters -- even though I never could before. Joann

    p.s. I love your Spark page.
    3891 days ago
  • 1TWIGGYPOP
    Just wanted to say...you are not alone in this struggle. I am going through similar emotions at this moment. You look like a beautiful person that deserves the best...don't give up and keep moving forward.
    3891 days ago
  • SIMPLE_TAILOR
    It is going to take some time, but you can get back to it. Just take a look at some of the good things going on and enjoy those each day.

    Let us know what we can do to help you back.
    3892 days ago
  • DENACARPER
    Hey, you can do it! You are worth it and I get it. I self sabotage - I also get to thinking that at times - I'm not worth it. But WE ARE worth it. As much as you want the absolute best for your kids, God wants even more for us. Just remember that you were created in HIS image and you were bought with a price. You are fearfully and wonderfully made!

    Think about what you would tell your kids if they came to you with the same stuff you blogged about. You would tell them they they are worth it and that they are loved and that they are beautiful - just remember - that's what God wants you to hear from Him.

    You can do it - I've got faith in you!


    3896 days ago
  • MERAINA
    We're still here girl! Love that you came back to us.
    Fight your fears & tears and do it for you.
    Don't limit your challenges, Challenge you Limits!
    Dance on Done Girl!
    3896 days ago
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