Monday, March 26, 2007
maybe i'm heavier than i'd like to be because i don't eat enough... if that makes any sense. seriously though... i have a philosophy behind this. i have been doing extensive amounts of reading the past few weeks, & i have learned about sending your body into starvation mode.
apparently when you do this, thinking that skipping meals or eating an extremely low number of calories is helping you... it's actually hurting you, because what you DO eat is automatically stored as fat.
and i mean, i'm really disappointed in myself for what i've eaten today. some peanut butter crackers & a handful of pretzels. whoopeeee. when i started this whole thing & decided to get on the right track & eat small meals during the day, that's what i was going to do. i'm over starving myself, but i can't seem to get on the right track.
i set my fat grams & calories lower than suggested, but i went over my fat grams yesterday. i know it was that damn donut. gahhh! i could have passed it up, it wasn't even that good, it was kind of stale! but i didn't, just because i guess i felt like i owed it to myself. i even got a french cruller because i figured it couldn't be that bad. boom, 15 extra grams of fat.
i soound so obsessive when i'm writing all of this stuff down! argh.
i feel sick to my stomach when i think about eating more than once or twice during the day, and i have upped my water intake by a million. i mean, i think i run to the bathroom every ten minutes! (at least it feels that way...)
i don't know. i feel a little lost. i'm all about staying motivated, as may of you will know, but i was just looking at my food list for today, & i was just like... you have got to be kidding me. i mean, i'm either not eating at all or not eating enough or something. weight isn't just falling off of me anymore, i guess i'm going to have to work for these 30 pounds!
does anyone have any good suggestions for snacks & things? i'm a notoriously picky eater. very little meat, so it's hard to keep my protien up... but i'm working on that. salty things have to be my vice, i mean... i'm not a big candy eater or soda drinker... but give me a handful of crunchy salty pretzels & i'm yours!