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Don't call me "Skinny"

Tuesday, July 09, 2013

Ok, so I saw my sister over the fourth and as I expected she was her usual self. She screams, "Oh My, You're so skinny!!"
Well, no, actually, I'm not...I'm healthy. I still have that pooch from carrying 3 children and that dang back fat that is SO stubborn, but I am in my goal range and I still work to lose more.
Sometimes, I think people say that to make you feel like you are anorexic or something. That you starve to get to your ideal weight. That you are only your scale number...and nothing more. It's a bit rude, if you ask me. She very obviously put on quite a few pounds since Christmas and I did not say, "Oh, you're so Fat!" So when you see me, say, "Oh, you look good, you look happy, you look healthy.
But NOT, You're so "Skinny".
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Well said!

    Our society has been so familiar with the abnormal that when we actually get to normal weight this is the reaction we get.

    You're looking good! You're looking healthy!

    emoticon emoticon
    2882 days ago
  • GEORGE815
    Some people just want to see you one way.
    2897 days ago
  • no profile photo CD8634484
    She might simply think that that's what you wanted to hear. After all people lose weight to look skinny! Right? emoticon It probably didn't cross her mind that you might prefer to be called healthy.
    2898 days ago
    I suspect she is jealous and maybe using the word 'skinny,' which isn't normally seen as complimentary, as a bit of a dig. If she had said 'slender,' it would have sounded nicer. If you can, let it slide off like water off a duck's back - you know that you are in a healthy range, and continue working to stay there and you can be proud of it - whatever the adjectives people use to describe you.
    2898 days ago
    I think sometimes when people call others skinny they are a little envious of seeing a healthier person in front of them. (I know I used to be jealous of others that had lost weight and were better because of it.) Now I'm the healthier one!

    I also think that Americans are so used to seeing unhealthy people that do weigh too much that healthy is the "new skinny." Overweight is the new norm and those of us in our weight range now seem skinny.

    Think of it as a compliment and keep living by example. Maybe your sister will get on board and they next time you see her you can yell, "You look so skinny." I bet she'd love to hear that!
    2899 days ago
    You have to care more about how you feel than what others think. MAybe she is just a tiny bit jealous that you are toning up while she is adding on the lbs !

    2899 days ago
    Someone else I'm Sparkfriends with made a blog like that about a year ago that his family members made some comments. You just have to consider the source. My Mom says rude stuff all the time. When I was 125 lbs in high school she kept telling me I looked just like her Mom. The pictures of her Mom that I have are of a middle aged 200+ woman. Just like I am now. Not very helpful. Soft_Val67 had a great idea about responding to your sister with I look healthy don't I. You're doing great and that's what matters. emoticon
    2899 days ago
  • SOFT_VAL67
    hmm, im undecided how to feel about this, i have a friend who always asks me, "how much weight have you lost and dont tell me you havent lost any cause i can tell"
    she has started saying this to me, since i broke my foot and my weight loss and workout had stalled, and maybe part of me wants to believe that shes saying it to encourage me to keep going.
    by saying she can tell i have lost weight, when i havent in months, maybe its her way of trying to encourage me to stay on track and stay focused and not give up.
    or maybe its a stab at me for not losing when she knows i havent.
    but i prefer to think shes doing it not out of a desire to stab or hurt, or make fun, but, to encourage me and help me keep focused.
    maybe your sister just doesnt get it that you arent all about getting skinney as opposed to getting healthy. maybe next time, instead of taking it to heart, just say something like, thanks, i feel so much better, i can breathe better, walk easier, dont ache all over, have good bp or cholesterol, etc
    just turn it to good health. who knows maybe it will encourage her. emoticon
    2900 days ago
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