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Day 191 - A New Week

Monday, June 08, 2015

Another Monday, another start to the week.... I have been working really hard at being happy about Mondays, when there's a part of me that still feels like staying in bed, pulling the covers up over my head, and hitting the snooze button.

NO WAY!!!!

Like an new pattern that slowly becomes a habit, staying positive has been my mantra for the past 13 months. Since the accident, I've really tried my best to keep upbeat, because truly the alternative just isn't that appealing. Why would anyone choose to be miserable? I know that each person's life experience is different, and for some it is really tough to smile. But I can tell you that if life throws you a curveball and you make the effort to see the good in the situation, your situation just naturally improves!

Case in point: my parents are moving to an independent living facility where they will have their own apartment, but the complex provides all their meals. My mother really wants this - she wants to let my dad out of the kitchen (he does the cooking), and they are eager to make this change. Unfortunately, all my mom can do is fret over what to do with their stuff - extra clothes, table linens, decorative items, furniture, etc. She wants a new sofa, so that means the old living room set will have to go. She worries about everything. This should be an exciting time for them, and all my mother can see are clouds.

I try to encourage her to see the bright side, but for her, it's just not in her DNA. But oh, how much better her life would be if she could see the good, rather than the bad. All I can do is pray that she will get through this, because I know that it's unlikely that she will ever change.

Can you see the positive in your own situation, even when it seems bleak? I encourage you to see at last one good thing in your life when you're feeling bad.

Bad: you got in trouble at work.
Good: you learned something that will help you avoid the trouble in the future.

Bad: you skipped your workout this morning.
Good: you realized how much you missed it, and re-commit to doing it for sure tomorrow.

Bad: you had a bite of something that was not on your eating plan.
Good: you congratulate yourself on stopping after a bite!

There is ALWAYS something good in every situation. All you need to do is find it.

Keep Sparking, friends!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Good for you, for seeing the bright side! It can be difficult sometimes. Letting go of so many of your cherished belongings all at once like that must really hurt. And she wants a say in where things go, I can understand that. She might try to be excited about getting a new couch, but worrying about things is a habit for her, so she can't really look forward to that. Once she's all settled, hopefully, she can start to enjoy things more. So your dad is a bad cook, or she wanted him to retire because it makes her nervous to see a man in the kitchen? Sometimes men can cook better than ladies!

    I am sad right now, because of something that happened. I overheard the little girl next door say to her little friend that her mommy (who was my friend, I thought) said that my brother and I don't help my mom enough. That means she doesn't like me, and doesn't believe me when I say I'm having health issues, and I really thought we were friends. But I've been trying to tell myself that it's just her opinion and I have more room to pursue other things in life, like books and music and Netflix, and organize things and maybe going out and about soon. Maybe when I'm feeling better, I'll hardly ever be at home, and I'll meet other people. Who knows? There are a lot of people, and I have to think of the bigger picture. It is just really making me sad right now, because I thought that we were friends, and she was my only "real" friend, you know, not on the internet. So now I'm planning on doing my best to not appear outside when I hear them all outside or see one of them and I will go out of my way to add two blocks to my walking route to get to the store, so that I have less chances of seeing her. It bothers me that she has been a false friend.
    2183 days ago
    This is truly motivating. You're so right about seeing the positive side of things - it is indeed a choice.
    Thanks for sharing this.
    2238 days ago
    Great blog Steve. The miserable comment had me laughing right out of the gate. Describes my ex wife to a T.

    Thanks well written and thought out.
    2239 days ago
  • RHOOK20047
    Gee Steve, your positive attitude is infectious. After reading your blog and Brian's from yesterday, I can't do anything but think positively about my life. Sure there are speed bumps in life, but how you react to them makes the difference. I do try to find the positives in all situations. Almost to a point, my wife would say. She sometimes tells me that if she wants to be mad or upset about something, she has that right, and it's not my right to show her the positives. But I do anyway. She must really like it since we are going on 40 years together. But seriously, thanks for your upbeat attitude, it has definited mad mine more upbeat! Have a great Wild Wednesday!
    2239 days ago
    Your blog reminds me of what my mother use to say, "You can find good in everything, all you got to do is look for it.
    2239 days ago
  • PICKIE98
    I can totally relate..My life was spent being raised by mom, negative Nora... It is hard to accept that some people choose to be miserable.. I stand aside and tell them they must simply LOVE feeling that way or they would change. It lets them know my feelings and they never do it in front of me again..Nice..
    2239 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12068097
    Sorry about your mom. Hopefully once the move is made life for her will change and for the better. I hope she starts to enjoy these years.

    Picking my son up at airport in a few hours. He is here for a week long visit. Last time I saw him was Thanksgiving. I cant wait to hug him. He is just a few years younger then you.

    Have meals planned plus walking along ocean, which will pleasantly surprise him.

    ps: does she use the computer at all. Finding a web sight like Spark would be so wonderful for her. Just an after thought.
    2239 days ago

    Comment edited on: 6/9/2015 2:44:46 PM
  • no profile photo JEANNETTE59
    emoticon Perhaps your mom would worry less about disposing of unneeded items if she new the joy they would bring to other folks, who are in need.
    2239 days ago
    I so agree...it's much better to see any good in things you can! Things can always be better BUT things can always be worse...you need to deal with what's happening and see room for appreciating and improving when you can!
    I hope your Mom can view this great life change as an opportunity for a new fresh start andvthe opportunity to help someone else! There's always a tax deduction for
    donations and so many in need...we have a place we have donated to who take furniture and then help set people up in a home who are victims of fire or abuse! I would hope she could take solace in helping someone else while moving on to her new life!
    I am so behind schedule...working on paperwork, etc. You will hear from me soon, my friend!
    2239 days ago
    well said and good points!

    i think worrying is a DNA for all moms.
    2240 days ago
    Love your take on making the best out of bad, Steve! My latest example of something like this is: doing some overtime for a project-application at work:
    bad - added stress and not enough free time. good - I can either take some time off later in the year, or I can take the hours in cash and buy a new washing machine without dipping into my savings!

    I hope your mum comes around to the idea that de-cluttering and down-sizing is liberating in the long run. Hope you guys can help your parents have a yard-sale or donate stuff to charities (maybe you have a long list of people in need of things through your work....).
    Now, I am off to concentrate on stopping after the first unplanned bite! Have a great week!
    2240 days ago
    2240 days ago
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