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Is this really me?

Saturday, August 08, 2015

After my amazing workout yesterday, I was so motivated to keep it going. I have so many times over the past years started and stopped working out because of depression and lack of motivation...so this was a HUGE move forward! So today I got up and cooked Josh and I a nice breakfast, and hit my basement for a workout. Started with a 35 minute run/walk on the dreadmill, then a long TRX upper body workout (to failure on most exercises). Finished off with 10 minutes on the treadclimber, stretching, and my 30 day plank challenge. It felt great - harder than yesterday, but my mojo was rocking!!

After the workout, Monkey and I had lunch then headed out to do some much needed yard work. Since Don passed a couple of years ago, I have only done the bare minimum outside...not sure why, lack of motivation, just didn't care...whatever the reason, it didn't happen. So when we went out today, it was evident how much work needs to be done. We did 2 hours, and will likely do another 2 tomorrow....

After yard work we headed down to the bowling alley to "bowl" 5 pin...LOL:) We are both terrible bowlers. Josh looked like he was trying to pitch the bowling ball down the lane, and I couldn't figure out how to get my balls to go down the centre of the lane. Whatever, we had fun - 10 pin is way easier for sure. Nachos and lettuce wraps were on the menu.

I'm not sure, don't want to jinx it, but I think I may be emerging from the stage of grief I have been in for a long time. Pretty excited about the prospect of clearing my head and focussing a bit more. Gaining as much weight as I have, and burying my head in the sand were not a great way of dealing with things, but I think they allowed me to get to this place, where I have motivation, and maybe am starting to give myself permission to consider me first. I think I devoted every bit of me that I could, to make sure my kidlets had the best possible life...perhaps now I have let go of some of what I was holding, and am able to give some to me as well....

Whatever the reason, I am feeling happy - Josh noticed it, and likes what he sees - his Mom is getting back to her old self.

Hugs and love,
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    emoticon emoticon emoticon You Trish! I wish I'd been paying attention to your blog sooner than now. This is great to hear, and I can definitely relate. It feels awesome to finally see the light at the end of the tunnel. I don't think you're jinxing anything. Grief takes time, and there's no formula for knowing how long that will be. The great thing about you is that you possess a strength and commitment that is rare. You know you can do this, because you already have. We both can.
    2143 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3967518
    Yes, great post and you went thru h**l and back. Bringing yourself back up takes time. I am super glad to read this and know we are here with hugs and pointy boots if needed ;-)
    2144 days ago
    I am so glad you are making your way back! Josh must be so happy too.
    2145 days ago
  • no profile photo CD557571
    Trish, this is just such a great post to read. You know I only wish the best for you, and I love seeing you back! Onward my friend.

    2145 days ago
    2146 days ago
    Congratulations on the new you emerging
    2146 days ago
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