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Knew This Would Happen

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

I have been struggling for so long with pain and loss of balance.
Frustration got to me.
Have been falling and/or losing my balance frequently.
Haven't been able to do much physically and am deconditioned.

Depression kicked in with a vengeance and I had a big meltdown.
Feeling scared, defeated and alone.
In the past 6 weeks I have had 3 epidurals, am on a muscle relaxant for spasms and an anti-inflammatory medication.

Saw the surgeon Monday and will see the orthopedist Thursday to discuss other alternatives. Am getting discouraged and losing hope.

Financially I am between a rock and a hard place.
All of my financial resources are depleted.
Medical bills continue to come in the mail six days a week.
Grateful there is no mail delivery on Sunday.

Just want to find a resolution to all this insanity.
In my heart I know this too shall pass.
Want it to hurry up!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 1MOM93
    Hope things are getting better for you. Medical issues are the worst. Not only do they combat you physically but financially as well. Hugs and prayers for you!
    2022 days ago
    You are not alone! We may be thousands of miles away, but we're with you! Wish I could be closer, though.

    Don't know what to tell you about the medical bills. Do you have insurance? Isn't there a cap on out of pocket expenses? Have you talked to the doctors, hospitals, etc.? Of course, when you're in pain anyway and scared and feeling alone, talking to bill collectors at the hospital, etc. is not the way you want to spend what little energy you have.

    Don't give up and don't give in to the depression. I wish I could help.
    2080 days ago
    Oh that's awful! I hope you find a solution soon.
    2086 days ago
  • KERRYG155
    Man, you really are dealing with a lot of stuff as if the pain isn't bad enough by itself. I will be praying the doctors can find a solution and soon including some financial answers. emoticon
    2086 days ago
    Ending soothing thoughts your way.
    2086 days ago
  • _LINDA
    emoticon emoticon emoticon So very sorry to hear of your struggles and suffering :-((( I hope there is some light at the end of the tunnel soon. Does your country not make some exception for catastrophic medical bills? I would not get the health care I am now receiving if my government wouldn't fund our health care and have exceptions for those with high drug costs. Even Dr.'s wouldn't earn enough to cover my costs.
    I have dealt with pain all of my life as my health issues started right from a baby. I have learned suffering in silence doesn't work. I am not afraid to ask from help from anyone or any company. If I qualify for a study that will get me on the latest drugs, I am all for it. If there is a charity that would help with special needs equipment, I am all over it. Amazingly, the drug I am currently on is not funded by my government, but the company is providing it to me for free of charge, no strings attached. But there is a whole list of research companies looking for subjects with specific issues to trial new treatments. If you need a walker to help you walk without falling, then check out local charity groups. When you can't provide for yourself, there is no shame in asking. Also can scour second hand stores. A lot of medical supply places sell second hand equipment people no longer need.
    Please find a way to get help for yourself, don't suffer alone.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2086 days ago
    Even though I'm on Medicare I have been avoiding the doctor and suffering in (mostly) silence. Just my 20% portion would be enough to sink us right now. Trying really hard to hold onto our house and that means we forego things that used to be commonplace for us.

    Praying they find some answers for you. It can be so frustrating.

    2087 days ago
    I hope that you receive some good news soon. I am sending a prayer.
    2087 days ago
    Oh, Veg, I wish I could help you out!

    Medical bills can be so intimidating. My DH just had a procedure done and he blithely never even asked how much it would cost. Now his eyes are bugging out over the numbers.

    Consumer Credit Counseling has some helpful advice:


    The path through this is probably narrow, winding, and beset by thorns, but keep focused on the light at the end.

    2087 days ago
    Hugs and prayers coming your way.
    Wishing you well.
    2087 days ago
    I am so sorry for your present situation. Each day is a NEW day with NEW possibilities...hope things will improve QUICKLY for you. Physically & spiritually too!
    2087 days ago
    Wishing you well!
    2087 days ago
    May a window open up soon for you since doors seem to be closing up one after another.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    2087 days ago
  • no profile photo CD15542977
    emoticon a miracle is due you soon!
    2087 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/17/2015 11:32:09 PM
    You are facing so much...wishes that it turns around soon for you. On Thursday....do ask if your meds have side-effects which might be causing an increase in both the balance issues and depression; perhaps they can at least help there.... You might also contact your nearest Senior Center and see if there is a volunteer group who could help you with meals/ house chores for a while. Hang in there, and trust your heart...!

    2087 days ago
    hugs and prayers.
    2087 days ago
  • no profile photo HMM121974
    I wish you the best. I will say a prayer for you. Keep the faith!!!
    2087 days ago
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