There are, from what I can tell by Googling and checking FAQs, about 5 million members on Sparkpeople. Therefore, when I posted my little SSP (shameless self-promotion) plea last week to vote for me as a motivator, it was more of a joke than anything, and I expected nothing to come of it. I have built up a small entourage of you fine folks since I started using the Community portion of Spark a few weeks ago, and I am so grateful for all of you, but in the grand scheme of so many people on a weight loss journey and doing such amazing things on their journeys, I really didn't think anyone would take notice of little ol' me. I have been flattered and inspired by the comments on my page, my activity feeds, and especially my blogs, and all of your kind words and encouragement has done miraculous things for me in a time when I am sort of "finding myself again" (I know, I know...a bit ridiculous for a woman of 45, but, hey, I'm sort of in starting-over mode here!). Your remarks about my weight loss have been so helpful, but even more meaningful to me have been your remarks about my writing and, most of all, your remarks about how I have motivated and inspired you to keep going or start going on your journeys.
For all these reasons, I was very humbled when I received word from Spark yesterday that I would receive a motivator badge on my wall. I was even more flattered when I woke up this morning and saw that I am today's featured motivator. I know it may not mean much to anyone that my page shows up in that spot on the screen, but it means a lot to me, because I know it is only because of YOUR nominations and votes and likes. Thank you all SO much for all your support. The word "motivation" really is defined as: "the reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way," and you have been that for me, especially when I've felt burnt out and enticed to give up.
Now that that's out of the way, I want to say that my Weigh-in Wednesday went okay. I am down by 2 lbs., and I have now lost 171.2 lbs. total. I am a former secretary and data entry person who is obsessed with spreadsheets, so during this journey, I've been using one to keep track of my progress. I thought my statistics might be encouraging to you:
Starting Date: 1/1/2014
Starting Weight: 329.0
Current Weight: 157.8
First Year Goal: 229.0 (Reached 10/1/14)
Ultimate Goal: 155.0
Lbs. to Final Goal: 2.8
Average Weekly Loss: 1.5
Total Loss: 171.2
Highest Weekly Loss: 7.0 lbs. (1/22/2014)
Lowest Weekly Loss: +7.3 (Gain, 12/31/2015)
Percentage of Bodyweight Lost: 52.04%
What do all these Excel calculations tell us (other than that I take some strange enjoyment in playing with formulas in cells)? All of the above equals one thing: You CAN. I have been on my journey for a long time, and today was my 119th weekly weigh-in. I have not lost my weight as fast as those folks on THE BIGGEST LOSER. I have some flabby skin in places that are, fortunately, still easily hidden by clothing. I occasionally cheat and take a flying leap (not a fall) off the proverbial wagon. I beat myself up for plateaus and gains. I have devoured 8 Peeps in a moment of Easter weakness. I do not exercise at all, even though I know I should. I think water tastes like bloody metal and really struggle to drink even two glasses a day. I am 45, and some of my joints feel like they are 90. I have gone through emotional tumults like divorce after an 8-year marriage and the death of both my parents in a 5-month span in 2015. I have a great deal of stress associated with finances and my business, both of which were very adversely affected during my rocky 2013-15. I do not sleep well most nights, and I wouldn't even know how to begin cooking most raw or healthy or organic things from scratch. Yet, I am 171.2 lbs. lighter than I was on that New Year's Eve so long ago. I am less than half the woman I was, but I am starting to feel like a whole person again. If I can do it, so can you, and while many of you have voted for ME as a motivator, I want you to know that your success, your perseverance, your encouragement, and your journeys have motivated me to keep going through this home stretch, as well as to pick up my writing again.
No matter where you are, the only guaranteed way to fail is to give up, so don't! We can, folks. Believe it, especially on your worst days, when the scale is not nice to you or temptation gets the best of you. I can, you can, and we WILL!
P.S. Have you been writing down those compliments? If you haven't, start. If you have, read them again...and keep writing down new ones!