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Getting my Sh!t Together

Saturday, November 03, 2018

This year was a very difficult one for me. It started fine, I was eating healthy, running 3-4 times a week, lifting weight 2-3 times a week plus yoga. I was -42 lbs down, happy, active, doing fine.

But on February I had an accident and I had to stop working out completely in order to recover. Due to some malpractices from my first doctor, the damage was worse and I ended up needing extra treatments and recovery time.

Of course this led to frustration, anger, depression...and that ended up with binge eating and emotional eating, and of course a whooping 31.5 lbs weight gain.

So I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself (about time!) and start working towards my goal again with small steps, little changes and a lot of hard work.

I'm tracking my food, trying to walk a bit more (as much as I can without injuring myself, I still don't have a green light for exercise) and I'll join a gym across the street so I can go and ride a bike, slowly, a couple times a day.

For me, my biggest obstacle is my own brain. I sabotage myself, I seek the comfort of my favorite food, and I let my sweet tooth run amok.
I know I fell, and I fell hard. But I won't give up in me and I still need to prove myself that I can reach my goal and stay there.

Maybe I need some psychotherapy to deal with my emotional issues, so I don't lose again against the binge eating monster.

I feel embarrassed to be here today after all my victories, but hell...I'm here and I can either keep feeling sorry for myself, or suck it up, put my big girl panties on, and carry on with what I must do...one day at a time.

What are your strategies to beat temptation and keep healthy when you can't exercise?
How do you go back on the proverbial wagon? Please let me know!
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 4CYNDI
    I love your new attittude and willingness to do what is needed now. It is tough to learn new behaviors and find things that move us toward the identity we want. Therapy is not a bad word, it can help you learn the why and ways to deal with it more constructively. I hope you find the right therapist (the hard part for me). Good luck and have fun learning on your newest leg of the journey.
    992 days ago

    993 days ago
    In 2014 I had a nice infection which over the next 2 yrs was horrid. It ended with the amputation of my left big toe. During those 2 yrs I was forbidden any exercise. I regained 56 lbs!!

    With the amputation I regaibed not only health physically, but realized I had NOT addressed my cravings. So yes, I went into therapy, still am. I've lost that 56 lbs and more in 2 years and I feel so much better!! Inside and out.

    Can you sit or lay and use either very light weights or no weights and move either your legs or arms? Maybe both? Are you able to do senior chair exercises? I felt STUPID at first doing senior exercises in my mid 50s, but quickly realized,, that was MY issue!! DUH!! They slowly helped me to move. Helped me rebuild what I had lost.

    Fast forward the 2 yrs and I'm now able to walk 3+ mikes(i live in chronic pain from a car accident years ago. Was told id not walk again).

    My Mom's words are always with me

    "Where there's a will, there's a way"

    It may not be the traditional way, but if you can dream it, you can achieve it. It's 90% attitude, 10% life happenings.

    My pain doesn't leave, but there are non medication ways to handle it. Yoga, stretches, accunpture (many Dr,, MDs now do these and most insurance cover all, bug the needles,,for me that's only $10)
    993 days ago
  • DRDIVA28
    You are back and that is what matters most. Congratulations on deciding to take your life back after a very tough situation, that I cannot possibly understand from the outside looking in. I have been through some stuff (we all have) and self-compassion is probably the most important tool in my toolbox for when I don't live up to my own expectations :) Sending you some Sparklove and tons of good wishes for your all-round recovery! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    993 days ago
  • JEN169
    I have a story of loss and gain. I lost a little over 70 pounds and then spent 2 years regaining 52 pounds. That works out to half a pound a week! I was reminded in a Facebook memory that popped up this morning, and it was hard to read that post of success. I understand how embarrassing it can feel. I was so glad to read your post! It is always nice to know we are not alone. I wish for you a speedy and complete recovery. I started over on Monday and have lost 7 pounds already. We've got this!!

    993 days ago
    Congrats on your new found commitment. Hurray! That's a big step all on its own. So proud of you for doing so.

    Regarding temptation: I try to plan ahead for that so it isn't an emotional decision but a practical one. Tracking is a super way to get back on track--one simple step that makes a huge difference. As soon as I see how out of wack my thinking is on that "daily results" view...I change it!

    Best wishes finding what works best for you in your scenario! Cheering for you!
    993 days ago
    You know what they say, meeting your issues is the first step! You've taken that. I have found starting REALLY small, and growing from there. Track all your food. Do that for a couple weeks. Find your triggers and try replacing them. For me, it's chocolate before bed, so now I have a couple dates. Surprisingly they are pretty good. Pasta is also one of my issues, and I won't stop having it, but now, it's a couple times a month, and I enjoy it so much more. I've tried to replace most "white" carbs but I will occasionally have bread or white rice, but not the norm. I've also replaced a lot of red meat with ground turkey for most recipes, and have found/made some yummy r copes that even my husband says yes please to. I have also started "following" (stalking) on IG a lot of WW sights that have good recipes or are very modivational. I do a little IF (intermittent fasting) but don't go overboard with that. While my progress is SLOW I've managed to drop 35 lb so far this year. And it was all with small steps. I wish you much success. I'm here if you want to talk... emoticon
    993 days ago

    Comment edited on: 11/3/2018 1:45:15 PM
  • MARCIE18
    You are back and that is the most important thing. I so relate to what you have been through and are going through (if you want specifics you can check out my Spark Page). All I can tell you is that I am glad I found the strength to put my shame aside and look straight ahead. We have a clean slate to try again so pat yourself on the back for not giving up. You/we can do this!
    993 days ago
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