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Hi! I'm GiGi and I'm starting my journey to get back to health, fitness, and positivity

Sunday, February 03, 2019

I had a reality check today, and it hurt my feelings. Then it made me mad. Then I decided to just accept where I am right this very moment--and move FORWARD in the healthiest way possible. SP is giving me so many new tools to use that I'm still in the learning process.. so please forgive me if I don't do or get something right for a little longer.

I excitedly stepped onto the nice treadmill at the family member's home I'm house-sitting for.. I had my playlist of FAV songs and a fully-charged battery to listen to my music--just in case I went over an hour. (LOLOL! Oops, getting ahead of myself) Over 3 years ago I could/would have gone 90 minutes at a fast pace. Tonight, I made it to 11 minutes... yup! JUST 11 minutes.. and my back/joints were hurting, my lungs were begging for my inhaler, and my brain was just disgusted with the rest of me, thinking "WTH?!?!?" I wanted to cry.. AFTER sitting down, of course.

Today's journey started 3 years ago, when I moved from sunny/warm southern California to cold/wintery, temperamental rural Michigan. It was a necessary move, but I was NOT happy about it. The stress of all the life events that created the need to move, and the actual below-freezing temps that were underway when I did move, triggered a bad Fibromyalgia and Hashimoto's flair. Debilitating pain, debilitating fatigue, and lots of nasty stuff put a serious crimp in my new indoor lifestyle. I tried to workout at the one gym in Tiny Town, but my body was in the throws of rebellion and pain. The snow prohibited the fresh veggie/fruit selections I was used to. New meds were required, some of which are steroids, to stop the constant inflammation and pain. I went from an uber-healthy, active, healthy-weight to an obese, inactive woman with reduced physical endurance/ability. The steroids put on 60 pounds quickly--even though I ate very healthy and counted every calorie. The extra 20 on top of that came from my giving in and eating baked goods and all the crap that Tiny Town community members baked and ate and shared. Am just now coming out of the bad flair... and am joyous to be mostly-functional again! Woo Hoo!! But my activity/endurance level is kaput! Two months ago I was ecstatic to be able to get out of bed and walk to the bathroom! Brushing my teeth was an accomplishment! But now, I want to cry... my brain seems to be in denial, and tonight I discovered that I can't simply resume at my previous fitness level.. and 11 minutes is it

Am feeling the gambit of emotions.. happy, angry, sad, resentful, frustrated, embarrassed... blah, blah, blah.... Bottom line is: This is where I am now and this is my new baseline. I need to suck it up.

So here I am. My humility/embarrassment of my current body/fitness in hand. My body has turned against me.. yet, maybe if I can just do my best every day it may turn this thing around. I've read so many incredible blogs--so many people have overcome such great obstacles and have regained healthy weights and good fitness levels! So many people are taking what actions they can each day, knowing that all these positive decisions/actions add up to a healthier, happier self. Each day I read your blogs and am uplifted, inspired, motivated and encouraged.

So I did my 11 minutes tonight. And after resting for 30 minutes, I did another 9 minutes. It's all I could do. But it's better than nothing. And its WAY better than anything I could have done over the last 3 years of my health--issues. Tomorrow I will do more short increments. And I'll eat the lean foods on my meal plan. And I read more blogs... and feel grateful for being part of a positive community in which I can start exactly where I am, now. God bless you all.
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Member Comments About This Blog Post
    Hey GIGIQUE, I know how it is to feel deflated when things get hard or when you have a setback. What you're trying to accomplish will not happen overnight but it will happen if you stick to it. Keep up the good work.
    856 days ago
  • no profile photo CD1987279
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    863 days ago
    You have taken the first few steps to a healthier you. You are eating more nutritiously and you have started to exercise again. It will take time but keep working towards your goals and you will reach them!
    868 days ago
    Hi GiGi
    You have a good 'Can Do' attitude...that is most important. It will take time, but it will happen. Keep checking in with SP when you start feeling down and don't give in to despair. I know you will do it.
    Keep positive...everyday is challenge, but just keep working it.
    There have been so many on SP that have had their own battles, but they keep trying.
    Check out the Spark Videos, besides some being funny there are also very inspiring ones too.
    Sending good thoughts your way!
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    869 days ago
    The fact that you got back on for 9 more minutes shows your tenacity. I hope we can continue to work together to lift one another up with support as we work towards our goals. Best of luck!
    869 days ago
  • FITNIK2020
    Look at you ... 11 plus 9 . That’s 20 and pretty good for anyone except those gifted runner types. For us mere mortals I’d say you are off and running🏃‍♀️...er walking, moving . You are on your way back.
    869 days ago
  • no profile photo CD24166014
    You got this!
    869 days ago
  • T37533
    Good luck
    869 days ago
  • no profile photo HOTPINKCAMARO49
    Awesome! Way to go!
    869 days ago
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