Why I am where I am and why it must change
Sunday, September 15, 2019
September 15, 2019--I gained weight during the summer challenge, not a fun place to be. I am motivated to make changes for me. Why? To lose weight, To be healthy, To reduce stress, To be there for my boys, For me time, To get to know like-minded people (joined a 10 week challenge at Fit Body Boot Camp), To look sexy in my bikini, To fit in my size 4s again, To get off zoloft, To learn how to maintain a healthy weight and lifestyle. I love Sparkpeople and it definitely helps me. As I am continuing to learn about my yo-yo dieting cycles, I do better in a group. Part of my reason why I love the 5% Challenges. Could I do all of this just through Sparkpeople, apparently not. I am missing the actual interaction with other women in person. I chose to move away from family, mostly because of their toxicity. However, I find myself getting isolated and not taking the steps I need to make friends here in my country home. My husband is not supportive of me doing challenges outside the house, as he knows it leads to me being tired, cranky, and spending a ton of money. However, I have let the stress of taking care of his mom, the stress of my job send me into a self destructive pattern. I need to be healthy for me and to be able to cope with crazy expectations. I don't want to be the mom who keeps losing her sh*t, failing at work from doing too much, not having enough time to spend with my family. Although I didn't realize it fully, it seems as if all this stress is depressing me. Hoping to truly change for me, so I can be the mom, wife, daughter-in-law I want to be.