SP Premium
~INDYGIRL
100,000-149,999 SparkPoints 133,890
SparkPoints
 

The STRUGGLE is REAL

Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Monday, October 14, 2019

People are not generally supportive. They pretend to be or try to be, up until they want to get off of their plan. They will not stay on their plan for our sake. Some in our lives cause stress and anxiety. So that leaves it up to us.

So when you feel unsupported, what should you do? Who do you turn to? I learned that I had to grow a relationship with God and learn to see value in myself. THAT was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’ve never felt like I was of value. I felt unworthy in every way possible. My self-esteem was so far below negative that it had to look up to see the earth’s core.

I went to a therapist and a doctor to get help many times. I found out that I was bipolar and clinically majorly depressed. I was not surprised at all. I had had a traumatic childhood and marriage and survived much violence in my life. Now I see a trauma counselor for help. She is very good.

I had to get to the root of my HEAD issues before I could get to the root of my weight issues, personally. I did much journaling and solving and reading and therapy and school and...
I literally went at it like it was my career, my sole purpose in life, to get out of my 460 pound body that I was trapped in bed with.


So what will YOU do? What obstacles are in YOUR life? What resources do you have?

How can you overcome those obstacles with your resources? What is your next step?


Beth Donovan
Share This Post With Others
Member Comments About This Blog Post
  • 1234GUERRA
    nice.
    595 days ago
  • no profile photo CD3802882
    I need to heal from my last surgery so I can return to working out.
    614 days ago
  • JAMER123
    emoticon emoticon
    614 days ago
  • SIMPLY_JAE
    I like it
    614 days ago
  • AALLEY2
    emoticon emoticon
    616 days ago
  • TRAVELGAL417
    emoticon
    616 days ago
  • DAWNFIRE72
    Thank you for your wonderful blogs. This one hit very close to home and thanks to the support of SP and certain family members I have finally done like you and made a career of sorting out my head issues because I know they are affecting my overall general health.
    616 days ago
  • PAMBROWN62
    Glad you were able to turn it around and achieve your great success. Keep moving forward.
    616 days ago
  • 4EVERDIETER
    Thanks for sharing.
    616 days ago
  • CLARI6457
    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    616 days ago
  • ROCKYCPA
    Thanks for sharing!
    616 days ago
  • JANCELEE51
    Great uplifting blogs. Thank you.
    616 days ago
  • WATERMELLEN
    Super blog . . . and yes, it's between the ears AND it's like a career!!
    616 days ago
  • NAESREALITY
    Words of Wisdom. Thank you!
    617 days ago
  • NEWSPARKDEBBIE
    Well said Beth!
    I remember the long hours of chats we had and how we talked about this very subject..... HUGS sweet friend!
    617 days ago
  • GETULLY
    Powerful words! Thank you
    617 days ago
  • NEWMOM20121
    Thank you for sharing.
    617 days ago
  • SMORSEBVR
    Thank you!
    617 days ago
  • FUNLOVEN
    If It's To Be, It's Up To Me! - - - and God, family, and my friends in life and here on SP!
    617 days ago
  • KNEESOCKS1945
    Thanks for a wonderful, inspiring blog, Beth, and thank you, too, Sparkers, for your thoughtful comments.
    617 days ago
  • no profile photo CD25101131
    I am going through counseling now. I lost my Dad a year ago and I need to change my thinking about myself. God is my strength through this. I am doing better but feel myself having to go through a lot. My Dad wasn't very nice to me so last week, someone asked if I was grieving the relationship I would have wanted to have with my Dad. It hit the nail on the head so I am concentrating on that.

    Thanks for sharing. emoticon
    617 days ago
  • RUTHIEBEAR
    Love that photo. I have seen a dietitian, work with a counsellor, train with a trainer - I call all of these my TEAM. SOmetimes the team includes doctors. Even with my TEAM, I can feel alone at times. The struggle is real.
    617 days ago
  • IRISHEI
    Thanks so much for the great article. I do ask God for help everyday and read a daily page in my book,
    Jesus Calling-- by Sarah Young. I am determined to eat healthy, exercise and watch portion control for life. It is not a diet, but a LIFE plan. Some days are easier than others, but I will not give up. Some days it is hard to stay on track, but I do my best and track all meals and plan ahead. I think eating out and going to meeting where there is food is a BIG CHALLENGE....IT is hard to keep your self control and not eat the wrong thing, but it is the Only Way I can keep the pounds off. Glad you have found peace now and you have lost so much. If I do not focus and have a slip, I just get back on track the next meal and TRY Harder to realize this is for me and no one else can do it. We are important and we are loved. Love ourselves and make better choices and it will be so much good toward our goal. I still want to lose a lot more and it is hard, but I am worth it.
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    Irish Ei
    617 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/15/2019 8:20:25 AM
  • no profile photo CD24382931
    Seems as if we have some things in common, Beth. I've been in therapy for 25 years and at one point I thought I had beat the biggest problem, but that's turned out not to be the case. I'm still there and I have to wonder why...
    emoticon
    617 days ago
  • THETROUT
    I'm very touched by this. I admire you so much. You have come from the depths of despair to solid ground. emoticon
    617 days ago
  • BABS4625
    Thank you
    617 days ago
  • GRAMMY065
    Thanks for your inspiration Beth. I too had to find my wholeness in God. I find it amazing that I know I get my everything from Him and yet some days I choose to try and go it alone! Oh well-65 and still learning! Hope you are healing well my friend.😘
    617 days ago
  • MARYJEANSL
    I find I don't really look for support in other people, at least not with regard to a healthy lifestyle. Probably just as well.
    617 days ago
  • no profile photo GREYTDOLPHIN
    Thank you for your insight. I was talking to someone today who said that she was going to try to find a trauma counselor. What a coincidence, twice in one day. I thought it was a good idea.
    617 days ago
  • REDROBIN47
    You are such an inspiration. Thank you for being you.
    617 days ago
  • no profile photo LAH1222
    Thank you.
    617 days ago
  • BJAEGER307
    My coping system has been a close relationship with my husband, son, family and girlfriends. They have pulled me through more than they can imagine. I feel so blessed for the people in my life.

    Also this community has been a savior with people like you. Always will to give support where needed. That's what makes this community so great, at least in my book.


    617 days ago
  • PATRICIA-CR
    Wise words!
    617 days ago
  • ALEXSGIRL1
    i started by liking one thing about me , I was kind i had nice hair, and then added , posters around the house you are special etc. then i started to look for joy in the sun the breeze all little things, my grandma was my only and best friend, i keep her with me but mostly i know after a long struggle do things for me make myself happy, i am in charge of this boat and where it will sail, me myself and I thanks for a good blog from a tiny spark comes a big flame
    618 days ago
  • no profile photo CD4114015
    Beth, I'm 71 but most of what you wrote in this blog fits me totally. I have had years of therapy, most of it worked. I still feel somewhat inadequate but I think age has helped me a lot. I have worked through most of it (psychotherapy) but in new situations I still feel like I am "less" than most. But I am blessed to have a husband that is the best person that could be paired with me. I love that you are so active on spark now. We all love you and each other and we can MAKE it!

    emoticon emoticon emoticon
    618 days ago
  • no profile photo CD12282919
    Great advice. I think everyone needs to find their support system, whether it be counseling, the Lord or friends.
    Thank you for sharing your awesome story.
    618 days ago
  • KITTYHAWK1949
    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
    618 days ago
  • DEE797
    emoticon Terrific advice as usual...
    618 days ago
  • QUARTERMASTER3
    emoticon emoticon
    618 days ago
  • BARBARAROSE54
    emoticon
    618 days ago
  • JCMSMILE
    I am doing my best to keep stepping, but I keep falling on my face (figuratively and literally). I know Who I need to lean on, but I am stubborn!!
    618 days ago
  • LIVINHEALTHY9
    Thank you for sharing this about yourself and what gives you strength.

    I always take away something good when I read your blogs.
    618 days ago
  • NANCY-
    Excellent questions that I need to answer.
    618 days ago
  • TOKIEMOON
    I am constantly amazed by your self-knowledge and wisdom. Reading your blogs are a significant part of my support system. Thank you, Beth!
    618 days ago
  • no profile photo CD11945874
    Having a quite similar background, with physical abuse as a young child and thru my teens and even into adulthood, the most wonderful thing I ever did was to make Jesus the Lord and savior of my life in 1978. I chat with him every day, and he and the Holy Spirit are my close confidante. I can honestly say I have never really had a 'support system' per se' …. and when I once buddied up with friends long ago to jog together, it was great for a while, but we all eventually moved away …. I am a pretty good self starter and look inward for that spark of God's life … and even this morning, I heard his nudge inside saying, "C'mon … let's go." … From Him I have come to learn and know that a person with a mean spirit or one criticizing me, does not make them right. But I let them think whatever they like, because through God I have a faith to live by, a self to live with, and a purpose to live for. … You ask what obstacles and I would say, sometimes fatigue is a pain along w/ chronic pain, but I stand on 103rd psalm and work around some things, to get where I want to be.
    618 days ago

    Comment edited on: 10/14/2019 1:48:47 PM
  • no profile photo EEJAA70
    Thank you!
    618 days ago
  • ANNIESADVENTURE
    When motivation is high and things are looking up, it's easy to be active on Spark. When we get stuck or feel like a failure, that's when we go quiet. It's ironic because that's when we need to be here more than ever. It took me awhile to learn that. The best cure is being even more active, helping others, finding inspiration from other Sparkers and articles/books and quotes, journaling, asking for help and helping ourselves. Wish I would have realized that a long time ago.
    Love that picture and the words. We can do one step. Just one step. Then another. I'm terrified of heights so that is how I have to approach unfamiliar steps.
    618 days ago
  • no profile photo CD25161562
    Looking inward to get to the reasons why we do things is so important. And when you have God on your side it does get easier but still difficult.

    You inspire a lot of people - you have done and are still doing a lot of hard work to continue making improvements to your health - thanks so much for sharing.
    618 days ago
  • LIVINGLOVINLIFE
    Life is so hard Beth, no matter what kind of support we have or don't have. I relate to so much you say. My coping methods are not the best, some work other don't. Self esteem is really very low most of the time, I am brittle. I do like myself but very frustrated. I try to focus every day on the positives of life, nature and people.
    618 days ago
  • IAMAGEMLOVER
    Thank you for sharing. We are not alone.
    618 days ago
  • Add Your Comment to the Blog Post

    Log in to post a comment
    Member Comments Page (65 total): 
    1


    Disclaimer: Weight loss results will vary from person to person. No individual result should be seen as a typical result of following the SparkPeople program.