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ILOVEROSES
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ILOVEROSES's Blogs

A student had to sit a hard test.
Wednesday, May 05, 2021      24 comments

A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the papers and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students h... Read more
A man was given the job of painting a road.
Sunday, May 02, 2021      21 comments

A man was given the job of painting the white lines down the middle of a highway. On his first day he painted six kilometres; the next day three kilometres; the following day less than a kilometre. When the foreman asked the man why h... Read more
A preacher goes to heaven.
Tuesday, April 27, 2021      22 comments

A preacher dies and when he gets to heaven he sees a New York cab driver who has more crowns. He says to an angel: “I don’t get it. I devoted my whole life to my congregation”. The angel says: “We reward results. Did your congregation al... Read more
A man goes to the Olympics.
Monday, April 26, 2021      28 comments

A man goes to the Olympics and walks past a man, with a long pole tucked under his arm. The man stops him and asks: “Excuse me sir, are you a pole vaulter, by any chance?” The man replies: “No I’m German. But how did you know my name i... Read more
A doctor is doing his morning rounds with a nurse.
Saturday, April 24, 2021      22 comments

A doctor is doing his morning rounds with the ward nurse. They come to the first bed where a man is laying half dead. “Did you give this man two tablets every eight hours?” asks the doctor. “Oh, no,” replies the nurse. “I gave him eigh... Read more
An old man goes to his doctor to complain about a pain.
Friday, April 23, 2021      25 comments

An old man goes to his doctor, complaining about a pain in his leg that won’t go away. He wants a diagnosis and explanation. The doctor checks out his leg, but can’t find anything wrong. So he gives the old guy a full physical exam, and still ca... Read more
How did we get here, Mum?
Thursday, April 22, 2021      24 comments

After a sermon on creation, a curious young boy asked his mother when he got home “Mum? How did we get here?” “Remember God created EVERYTHING in six days. On the sixth day, he scooped up some dust and made Adam. He took one of Adam’s ribs ... Read more
A university student had a test.
Monday, April 19, 2021      29 comments

Joe, a university student, was taking a course in ornithology, the study of birds. The night before the biggest test of the semester, Joe spent all night studying. He had the textbook nearly memorised. He knew his class notes backward and forwar... Read more
A woman bought some expensive make-up.
Saturday, April 17, 2021      23 comments

Joe’s wife bought a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After spending hours in front of the mirror applying the ‘miracle’ products, she asked: “Darling, honestly, what age would you say I am?” L... Read more
A man was golfing.
Wednesday, April 14, 2021      26 comments

A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. He was driving his partner nuts. Finally his exasperated partner said: “What’s taking so lo... Read more
A pregnant woman is in an accident.
Monday, April 12, 2021      24 comments

A pregnant woman is in an accident. While in a coma, she has twins – a boy and a girl. When she wakes up she asks the doctor about her babies. The doctor says they’re safe but her brother named them. “My brother is an idiot!” she replies... Read more
A couple were sitting together.
Saturday, April 10, 2021      23 comments

A couple were sitting on their front deck when their neighbours walked by holding hands. The wife sighed and said: “Look here, Mike. See how Mary’s husband takes her to movies and dinner every weekend? Why can’t you do that?” Mike took... Read more
A little girl and a little boy are at daycare.
Friday, April 09, 2021      28 comments

A little girl and a little boy were at daycare. The girl approached the boy and said: “Hey Billy, want to play house?” He said: “Sure! What do you want me to do?” Sally replied: “I want you to communicate your feelings.” “Communic... Read more
Two businessmen met again after a long time apart.
Thursday, April 08, 2021      23 comments

Bill and Moe had started with only $500 between them, but they had built up a computer business with sales in the millions. Their company employed over two hundred people and the two executives lived like princes. Almost overnight, things c... Read more
Jimmy’s teacher was looking over his homework.
Wednesday, April 07, 2021      26 comments

Jimmy’s English teacher was a perfectionist and demanded the very best from his pupils. So it was only to be expected that he would get furious when Little Jimmy handed in a poor paper. “This is the worst essay I have ever had the misfortun... Read more

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