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ILOVEROSES
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ILOVEROSES's Blogs

HOW THE FIGHT STARTED.
Sunday, June 22, 2014      14 comments

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift... The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!" An... Read more
Calculate your age!
Saturday, June 21, 2014      14 comments

This is one for all you mathematicians. "Your Phone number will reveal your Age. I do not know who discovered this? Really accurate. It will take about 15 seconds, read and do it at the same time so that yo... Read more
Jewish English.
Thursday, June 19, 2014      14 comments

The New York City Public Schools have officially declared Jewish English, now dubbed Hebronics, as a second language. Professor Shulman explains, "In Hebronics, the response to any question is usually another question with a com... Read more
Fable of the Porcupine.
Wednesday, June 18, 2014      15 comments

It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold. The porcupines, realizing the situation, decided to group together to keep warm. This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of each one wound... Read more
What is Politics?
Monday, June 16, 2014      13 comments

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. ~Oscar Amringer, "the Mark Twain of American Socialism." A politician is a fellow w... Read more
HOW TO STAY YOUNG.
Sunday, June 15, 2014      15 comments

Stay Young My Friend We all need to read this one over and over - until it becomes part of who we are! 1. Try everything twice. On one woman's tombstone she said she wanted this epitaph: "Tried everything twice. Loved it bo... Read more
Why Women Lie.
Saturday, June 14, 2014      17 comments

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, 'My dear child, why are you crying?' The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen... Read more
Odd Spot #13.
Friday, June 13, 2014      13 comments

A fox in Britain has stolen dozens of emoticon and dumped them outside a woman's house. The problem has become s... Read more
Odd Spot #12.
Thursday, June 12, 2014      12 comments

Crucial details in 30 New York trials went unrecorded because the court typist was writing "I hate my job. I hate my job" over and over instead, it has emerged. At least 10 convictions could be overturned after stenographer Daniel Kochanski fa... Read more
'OLD' IS WHEN...
Wednesday, June 11, 2014      37 comments

'OLD' IS WHEN...Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!' 'OLD' IS WHEN...Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot. 'OLD' IS WHEN..... Read more
Today's Bible reading.
Tuesday, June 10, 2014      14 comments

Today's Bible reading is from Genesis: And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the Earth. Then God made the Earth round. And she laughed. ----------------------------
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What a difference a Century makes!
Monday, June 09, 2014      15 comments

The year is 1910, over one hundred years ago. What a difference a century makes! Here are some statistics for the Year 1910: The average life expectancy for men was 47 years. Fuel for a car was sold in drug stores only... Read more
Italian Funeral.
Saturday, June 07, 2014      20 comments

A Jewish man was leaving a convenience store with his espresso when he noticed a most unusual Italian funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about 50 feet behind the first o... Read more
An Irishman on a diet.
Saturday, June 07, 2014      25 comments

An Irishman was terribly overweight, so his doctor put him on a diet. 'I want you to eat regularly for 2 days, then skip a day, then eat regularly again for 2 days then skip a day. And repeat this procedure for 2 weeks. The next t... Read more
Latex Gloves.
Wednesday, June 04, 2014      20 comments

Next time you use a pair of latex gloves when you're painting or crafting, you're going to smile when you think of this: A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous, so he decided to tell her a little joke as ... Read more

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