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ILOVEROSES
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ILOVEROSES's Blogs

SIGNS!
Monday, October 20, 2014      12 comments

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." ************************** In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." ************************** On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals... Read more
A short journey along memory lane.
Friday, October 17, 2014      12 comments

HEY,WASN'T THIS US? A little house with three bedrooms, one bathroom and one car on the street. A mower that you had to push to make the grass look neat. In the kitchen on the wall we only had one phone, And no need for r... Read more
Have you seen my mind?
Thursday, October 16, 2014      15 comments

Dear Friends: Just a line to say I'm living ... That I'm not among the dead, Though I'm getting more forgetful And mixed up in the head. I got used to my arthritis, To my dentures I'm resigned, I c... Read more
Four Retirees Walk Into A Bar....
Wednesday, October 15, 2014      14 comments

Four older retired men are walking down a street in Yuma, Arizona. They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - ALL drinks 10 cents." They look at each other and then go in, thinking this is too good to be true. ... Read more
MARRIAGE AND MARIJUANA
Tuesday, October 14, 2014      12 comments

For those who haven't heard, CALIFORNIA just passed two laws: 1.allowing gay marriage and 2.legalizing use of marijuana. The fact that gay marriage and marijuana were legalized on the same day makes perfect biblical sense b... Read more
Two-Line Poetry Competition.
Tuesday, October 14, 2014      12 comments

THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A TWO-LINE RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE, AND THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE: 1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife: Marrying you h... Read more
If you were in my shoes.......
Sunday, October 12, 2014      24 comments

Man returns home a few days early from a business trip because he suspects his wife is having an affair. It's after midnight and he asks the Cabby if he will come inside and be a witness. For $100, the Cabby agrees. They tip toe ... Read more
Yes, this is US!
Friday, October 10, 2014      16 comments

Senior citizens are constantly being criticized for every conceivable deficiency of the modern world, real or imaginary. We know we take responsibility for all we have done and do not try to blame others. HOWEVER, upon reflection, we woul... Read more
101 year old Hattie MacDonald
Thursday, October 09, 2014      12 comments

I love her way of thinking.... Interview with 101 year-old Hattie Mae MacDonald of Feague, Kentucky: Reporter: Can you give us some health tips for reaching the age of 101? Hattie: For better digestion I drink Beer. In the ... Read more
Finally a blonde joke I haven't heard ..
Wednesday, October 08, 2014      15 comments

A blonde gets a job as a physical education teacher of 16 year olds. She notices a boy at the end of the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun kicking a football. She takes pity on him and decides to... Read more
7 Days of Laughter
Tuesday, October 07, 2014      12 comments

MONDAY The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex... Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family’s status, she consulted the family doctor. The doctor told her that ... Read more
Never Argue with a Woman!
Monday, October 06, 2014      19 comments

One morning, the husband returns the boat to their lakeside cottage after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out herself. She motors out a short dis... Read more
Holy email.
Monday, October 06, 2014      6 comments

One day God was looking down at earth and saw all of the rascally retirees' behavior that was going on. So He called His angels and sent one to earth for a time. When the angel returned, he told God, 'Yes, it is bad on earth... Read more
A man and a penguin.
Friday, October 03, 2014      21 comments

A guy is walking down the street with penguin following him. Cop asks the guy why he's walking a penguin. Guy says the penguin just started following him. Cop says: "take him to the "ZOO". Next day, the cop sees the same guy and the pen... Read more
WHERE DO RED-HEADED BABIES COME FROM?
Thursday, October 02, 2014      11 comments

After their baby was born, the panicked father went to see the Obstetrician. 'Doctor,' the man said, 'I don't mind telling you, but I'm a little upset because my daughter has red hair. She can't possibly be mine!!' 'Nonsense,' the doct... Read more

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