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SMURFETTE2423's Photo SMURFETTE2423 Posts: 3,295
12/1/09 10:32 A

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KRISTEN- It's OK to have tears when you sing. You may want to put on your description that you are dedicating this season of singing to the memory of your Dad, who loved to listen to you. Certainly the judges would understand it then. I know that you have mixed feelings about your Dad because of his alcoholism and that may even be contributing to your sadness, but he is in heaven now and knows how he let you down so often and would be the first to say, "Yes, use me as the excuse for your tears. I have a lot to make up for and this can be the start." So, explain it, then sing your heart out and "WOW" those judges.You can do this. You are not a FUTURE singing star- you are a singing star NOW! Love and hugs, Laurie

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LADYDI2049's Photo LADYDI2049 SparkPoints: (0)
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11/25/09 9:25 A

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There are some very good suggestions here so maybe try what you feel most comfortable with. This will be a very difficult time of year for us all. For me something that really helped was doing a daily blog. Writting out my feeling was very theraputic and the love and support I got from Spark People readers was invaluable. Hang in there Honey, we are here when you need to unload.

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LAUREL220's Photo LAUREL220 Posts: 2,443
11/23/09 1:45 P

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Ohhh that is so hard, I am so sory...with music being such a deep passion for you, I'm sure that singing of any sort does stir up so many feelings. Obviously no one can tell you to just do it. But I do like the idea last mentioned about just singing through the tears, doing some extra singing. Let loose and with practice, you will be able to make it through somehow. I love to sing, ended up with a music minor because I decided to go another direction, but singing at church kind of triggers it for me. But only if the lyrics are relevant. For you it sounds like it's all singing. Just sing your heart out...just keep going...you will never forget or stop loving your dad, but also remember to give yourself permission to feel some joy. I don't know what to say to help you other than that I am glad you shared this with us because it's important to your healing, and it's important for us to be here for you and for our grief journeys too. Love, Laurel

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11/22/09 10:19 P

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Isn't it funny how somethings just trigger tears? I used to cry while singing hymns even before I lost my parents.

Any chance you can do extra singing at home to let the tears flow and maybe it would relieve some of it? Are you able to sing through the tears and just let it be?

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JUSTSLS's Photo JUSTSLS Posts: 2,381
11/22/09 7:10 P

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I lost my Mom in January and am going through the same thing, last week I cried for 2 days straight for no reason. I think it's the holidays approaching is what triggered mine. I don't know what to say to help you except to try and think of the happy times, things your Dad did that made you happy or laugh. If you are focused strongly on your signing maybe your thoughts won't be allowed to think of your Dad at that particular time. Hope you get through it ok. emoticon

11/22/09 5:48 P

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Hi guys, I need any help/advice you can offer. My Dad died 5 1/2 months ago and I'm going through another bad phase of grieving. (By bad I mean a lot of crying.) The unfortunate part is that I start crying every time I sing. . . and it doesn't matter what I sing. Warm-ups, church hymns, arias, artsongs happy or sad it brings on the tears. I'm a masters of music student in singing and I have three auditions this week but can barely focus and practice for them because I keep crying every time I sing!! Has something like this happened to you? Any ideas how I can get through this, at least enough to not cry during my lessons, coachings, and auditions?

Keep going, keep dreaming, don't ever give up.


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